HEAD CHEFSurly JeffersonArrrrrren't you glad you made a reservation at Goulden Girls Cafe? Well, you shouldn't be. We don't take reservations and we don't take kindly to your type round these parts. Now go on, git! Scram! Skiddadle! Be sure to check out our menu below and tell your friends so they can git out too!
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A BRILLIANT MENU
At Goulden Girls Cafe, we pride ourselves on there always being food and drinks available.
This is because we are a restaurant and selling food and drinks is how we make money.
This is because we are a restaurant and selling food and drinks is how we make money.
COCKTAILS
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DINNER (3-COURSE $79!)
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RESERVE
SKIP THE LINE
How many times do we have to teach you this lesson old man? We don't take reservations. Show up. Sit down. Try to make it out alive.
You will be redirected nowhere, there's nothing. Stare into the void.
LOCAL
FARMED FRESH
All of the ingredients used at Goulden Girls cafe are certified edible. The human body is a miracle and can digest an incredible array of items. There's one guy who ate a bike once. It was on TV, look it up. You won't get to eat a bike at Goulden Girls Cafe. Unless you special order it like waaaay in advance. You can eat a chicken though. And tomatoes and lemons and cucumbers and like a yellower orange and Bruce Vilanch.
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File Size: | 963 kb |
File Type: | mp3 |